George Michaels

James McClure:

I heard Father Figure today and it got me thinking:

1. What do you think about the 1980's music revival that we have been experiencing recently? I feel like Hall and Oats may end up with another #1 hit in the next year or so.

2. What happened to George Michaels? I went back and looked at some videos. He used to be the man. He had tons of models and sex with models in the videos. He was the man. How did he become the punch line for every anonymous-homosexual-hand-job-in-the-park joke?

Frank Leyland:

Wait!!! There is a 1980's music revival... Get the car fired up Donny McDork, we're getting the hell out of here!

I think the more interesting question is why did all forms of art suck in the 80's. My theory: The Personal Computer. There has always existed a nitch in our society for people who are commonly referred to as 'nerds'. Up until the mid 80's, this nitch was relatively small and powerless, as most jobs required strength and/or personality. The creation of a 'cheap' computer in the early 80's totally changed the skill set required of the successful American worker, drastically increasing the power of the 'nerd nitch'. People who understood words like "floppy disk" and "DOS" suddenly had more (or at least as much power) as those who were just handsome and charming. It was Darwinism at its finest. My theory (as I wasn't old enough to really experience the 80's) is that nerds, with their newfound power, invaded all forms of life; music, art, clothing, etc. Since they don't have any taste, everything suffered.

Not George Michaels?

Finally, George Michaels became the punch line for "anonymous-homosexual-hand-job-in-the-park jokes" because he got an anonymous homosexual hand job in the park. I think that falls under the category of "you are what you eat". Also, everyone who was born after 1986 confuses him for this guy...

James McClure:

I think it's even worse. I'm pretty sure that he was giving the hand-job.

Dude, I'm loving the holiday music. I'm blasting Last Christmas right now. I don't think that anyone else in the office appreciates this.

Frank Leyland:

It is after Thanksgiving so no one can really bust your balls about the music choice until New Years day. That being said, I'm not sure 'blasting' is the appropriate volume for a work environment unless your job takes place in one of the following settings: "Stadium/Arena" "fishing ship" or "Stage w/ or w/o pole"

Let's bring this conversation back to the 80's (and not the 1880's when half of your lame Christmas music was written). Don't you have any opinion on my Nerd Nitch theory?

James McClure:

Well, I would have to agree that the computer gave power to the nerds. Although, it also took power away from true nerds:

The computer has made tedious, number-crunching, accuracy and precision based tasks relatively easy. This has allowed more people to perform the tasks traditionally dominated by nerds. It has produced the effect of making more people "nerds", and the true, hardcore nerds less marketable.

Frank Leyland:

Yes, and yes. I totally agree that because our generation grew up with computers any advantage 'real nerds' had over everyone else has disappeared. Everyone is a 'nerd' now in the sense that they can work a pc, understand the internet, and even use it to create something awful (i.e. this anti-blog thing). I would point to our friend, Censored, as a great example of this. He definitely fits the strong and personable category and had he not grown up in the 90's (or later) would have never touched a PC. Instead he now crunches numbers for a large bank, essentially stealing a job only a 'true nerd' would have been able to perform in the 80's. He is better suited for this job because he has all of the technical skills a 'nerd' does without all of the awkwardness of a 'true nerd'.

This means that, ironically, the increased power of the 'nerd nitch' that the PC created in the 80's also caused the destruction of said nitch by the 90's, as everyone in our generation became a 'nerd'. As proof of my thesis I would like to point out that the destruction of most forms of art (interpretive dance still sucks, see video) was promptly reversed by the mid 90’s.

James McClure:

This has gone too far. You're up there making the rise and fall of the nerd sound like it fits into some Buddhist cycle. Look, it's simple. The computer is three things: 1) a giant filing system, 2) a giant calculator for complex calculations, 3) a communication device. Its widespread distribution is has replaced a good many things: people who add up numbers in neat rows, secretaries, the calculator, the typewriter, print news, shorthand, and comming soon - network/cable television, and radio.

There is a reason we no longer send telegraphs.

P.S. Was interpretive dance ever popular; worthwile; anything more than a reason for your gay friends to ask you to come to an event?

Doggystyle

Frank Leyland:

Wait, you're saying that Lewbowski's landlord was gay? That thought had not occurred to us dude.

You forgot to mention porn in your list of pc uses... unless giant filing system is your lame code for rub one out.

James McClure:

I'll concede that: the internet is the most penis-friendly invention since doggy-style.

Frank Leyland:

That was a great album...